NICU connection

Editor’s Note: The following is part two of a two part series about the Williams family and their extended stay in the NICU with their new son Hudson as doctors try to figure out what is wrong with him. This piece will focus on the connection they made with a fellow NICU parent and others who have helped during this time.

No parent expects a pregnancy to end in a stay in the neonatal intensive care unit. Even Newton couple Roy and Hanna Williams never expected that to happen to them.

The couple found out their new baby was growth restricted in utero and decided to deliver at the University of Iowa Hospitals just in case. However, they truly believed the baby would come and they would return home in a few days with their new bundle of joy.

Hanna Williams reached out to her friend, Prairie City-native Katie Buck before the delivery because she knew Buck had been through a similar situation with her son Alex. In fact, the two met because Williams helped Buck’s medically-fragile son Alex by donating breast milk. After birth, Alex was diagnosed with trisomy 18, which is usually has a very bleak diagnosis.

Wanting to increase his chance of survival, Buck wanted to give Alex to receive the antibodies in breast milk for as long as she could. She was able to supply Alex milk for a while on her own but she ended up needing to turn to other moms to help through donation.

Williams had heard about Buck’s need for donor milk from a friend of a friend. She was having an excess after her first son Paxton in 2016 and wanted to give to a mom in need. That was the first milk she donated to Alex.

“She donated a long time,” Buck said. “She kept our baby healthy while he was so medically fragile and I wasn’t able to do it. So we got connected that way so we developed a friendship.”

Williams continued to donate when she had her daughter Laekyn in 2018. They set up a continuous donation to deliver freshly expressed milk to Buck to keep the highest concentration of antibodies, something that decreases when breast milk is frozen.

After not being expected to live long after birth, Alex celebrated his fifth birthday last month thanks in part from the antibodies he received from the donated breast milk.

“I think she kept him on breast milk for three years and I know Alex’s (doctor) had really credited that to keeping Alex so healthy the fact that he had had breast milk for so long,” Hanna said.

When Williams was pregnant with Hudson and found out he was growth restricted, she immediately reached out to Buck for advice. Buck tried to remain optimistic for Williams, thinking the odds the baby would be born with birth defects were low.

“I said don’t panic and don’t worry about it,” Buck said.

Williams also believed the birth would be just like her other two and they would take the new baby home in a matter of days. What happened next has sent their entire lives in a whirlwind.

Williams said the delivery was difficult and she was happy when she woke and found out Hudson had survived. But the family would be facing uncertainty for months as the doctors tried to find out why he was having trouble breathing.

Hudson, who was born Oct. 25, has a microdeletion on Chromosome 1, something so rare the doctors don’t really know much about it. They also don’t know if that is the reason for his breathing issues. The ongoing pandemic has delayed answers as they wait for time in the operating room for Hudson’s doctors to perform exploratory procedures.

“They’re still doing tests to figure out the reason behind his respiratory issues. And it could mean a long NICU stay,” Buck said.

As Williams and her husband navigate this unexpected situation, they have been grateful to the people who have helped support them during this time. Buck has been an invaluable resource to help the couple through the unexpected environment.

“Katie has been awesome helping us navigate the NICU. Honestly if it weren’t for her, I don’t know what I would do. I talk to her almost all day every day,” Williams said.

They have also had to lean on family members to care for their other two children and take care of their pets at home. The distance between home and NICU is too great for them to consider driving back and forth every day, so the kids have been staying with grandparents in Newton.

The couple has experienced increased financial struggles because of this. Williams had just started a job as a veterinary assistant but now she is unsure if she will be able to return to that job. If Hudson’s condition requires home medical care, she will likely have to stay home to tend to his needs.

She is thankful Roy has a stable position at Jeld-Wen. He has been working remotely since March and they have been very understanding of his current situation.

On top of everything else, the couple is experiencing car troubles with all three of the vehicles they own. They were forced to borrow a car from Roy’s parents to at least provide reliable transportation.

Williams admits she and her husband have never been good at asking for help.

“It’s almost like we’re ashamed. I know most people in our situation would be struggling,” Williams said. “Katie has definitely opened our eyes to that. She’s been lovely. We adore her.”

Buck helped the couple start a GoFundMe page (https://www.gofundme.com/f/285xftaayo), to help the couple with expenses during this time.

“They helped our baby so much and now I want to help them and help them stay with their baby and be with their kids at the same time to make life a little bit easier at the same time. I relate to their struggle so much because we went through something so similar I know it just halts your life. You have to take time off work. You have to totally rearrange your life,” Buck said.

They have also been very thankful for the Ronald McDonald House for providing them a place to live while Hudson is in NICU in Iowa City. They have received financial help from different foundations to help with travel expenses.

Hanna feels extremely blessed to have so many people reach out and offer their support during the experience. She had no idea how many people they knew who had been in the NICU with their children, even if the stay was much shorter than what they had experienced. To hear people’s stories lets them know they are not alone in their feelings.

“I truly don’t know how we are ever going to pay it back to society. In a time where you feel so isolated, to see all of these people pull together for us is really awesome,” Williams said.

Contact Pam Pratt at 641-792-3121 ext. 6530 or pampratt@newtondailynews.com