Maya Angelou once said something like, people won’t remember what you said or did but how it made them feel. I’ve been reminded this week of two people who are prime examples of that sentiment.
Junior Banks
As soon as I turned 14, I started working at my neighborhood grocery store, Hy-Vee West, and I loved it because it was a familiar environment.
Although I was new to the service business I found myself becoming more familiar with the customers too. You remember people so vividly working at a small store. One of the first customers I became fond of was Junior Banks, bless his heart, who always had a fresh smile on his face, an incomparable laugh and genuine interest in others.
He had a heart of gold and remembered my name without fail even when I felt like a forgettable teen. It was like I had known him my whole life. He was the most comfortable person to be around.
I began to look forward to his arrival at the store and even after I left for college, I still missed Junior. He really cared and made me feel like a valuable acquaintance in his life.
On Sunday, I went to his wife’s visitation and told him how great of a job he had done taking care of her. He was a devoted husband, hard worker and really loved the woman he married. But I never told him how much I enjoy his presence. So Junior, if you’re reading this, thanks for being so friendly, caring and a memorable friend in my life. I also saw your junior year picture in the Class of 1946 yearbook this week and thought of you again. Mom also said you look dapper in yellow from the funeral.
Nguyen Viet Hung
A friend of mine went to a speed dating event in the twin cities this week, and to no surprise, said it was a dud. I went to a speed dating event once.
Eight years ago, a friend Chelsea and I heard of one at dorm Friley Hall around Valentine’s Day in Ames. We laughed about it but then decided we’d go, check it out, for fun.
We sat by each other and before we knew it there were 50 boys rotating down a line of chairs who all had maybe three minutes to spend with each of us.
Neither of us wanted to date, nor were we expecting anything to come out of the event, and we were right, except for one exception.
Everyone was too scared or too sheltered or too rural or too smart, but we enjoyed the experiment of meeting 50 strangers. Toward the end of the event, however, we met one guy named Hung.
Hung was a graduate engineer student from Vietnam who we took under our wing immediately. He asked interesting questions about us, he had a child-like innocence and he smiled with delight for nearly six minutes.
We traded numbers with him and he texted us back with a kind compliment about how he too was glad he went so he could meet us and hoped we could be friends.
I’m not sure how the rest of the story went, but for the next four years, we stayed in touch and Hung attended all our parties, wished us happy holidays, shared coffee over class breaks and became part of our families. He even spent a day at the Iowa State Fair with my mom and I.
Although he was far more fascinating and versed he cared how we were as friends, he inquired and he showed his compassion with a smile. He wasn’t full of himself like so many other college students. Neither Chelsea nor I will forget how he made us feel — so accepted and appreciated.
We should all practice selflessness more often and genuine interest in those souls that cross our paths. Smile simply for seeing another person and not because you want to be seen.
If you’re lucky, people will remember you, and if they do, they’ll remember the way you made them feel.
Contact Kate Malott at 641-792-3121 ext. 6533 or kmalot@newtondailynews.com