The (fake) Crying Game
I am so good at fake crying that I wish it was a contested sport. If producing fraudulent tears was an Olympic event I would surely be awarded the gold medal. I would be standing on the podium (next to Halle Berry) as the National Anthem played, proudly representing my country and wiping away fake tears with an American flag the whole time.
Don’t believe me? I don’t care. I won’t lose sleep about it tonight, nor will I (fake) cry myself to sleep. Trust me, I am a much better fake crier than you or your whiny toddler could ever hope to be.
I can whip up some flowing fake tears faster than it takes a person to say crybaby. My eyeballs are an emotional waterworks that I can turn on and off lickety-split. I have pretending to pout down to a science.
If you have any technical difficulties, either with your username and password or with the payment options, please contact us by e-mail at email@example.com