March 19, 2024

Speak Out event recognizes sexual assault victims

Crisis Intervention Services hosted the event

For two years a student, son and friend hid a personal story of a crime that happened to him by someone he trusted. Five years later, 20-year-old Seth Fahlenkamp is speaking publicly about sexual assault and how he has received resources that changed his life.

Those resources came from Crisis Intervention Services, an organization that works to provide support and empowerment to victims of sexual assault and domestic violence in ten Iowa counties, including Jasper.

The organization held an event, Speak Out, Thursday at DMACC in Newton to inform the community of the resources available and garnered more than 15 attendees. The event featured three guest speakers, including a sexual assault victim.

Fahlenkamp said he was 16 when he was taken advantage of by his teacher at Montezuma High School, Derek J. Bates. Bates was also looked up to as a spiritual leader in the community. Fahlenkamp said he was among at least four other male students who suffered the same abuse.

Bates was sentenced in January 2017 after he pleaded guilty to two charges of sexual exploitation by a school official.

After the allegations reached law enforcement, Fahlenkamp said all he wanted to do was block out the event and forget about it — he didn’t want people to know he was one of the victims.

Fahlenkamp said for two years he showed no emotion.

“I went through this with my best friend, he was victimized with me,” Fahlenkamp said. “It’s an extremely tough thing to go through and you make yourself forget what even happened — you don’t want to remember. Just as the word victim is a part of me, it’s a part of who I am, you still feel a lot of guilt and shame.”

Fahlenkamp said as soon as he spoke out at a church camp, it was the most powerful thing he has done.

“The reason I spoke out was because someone else spoke out,” Fahlenkamp said. “The very first night of this church camp, the speaker spoke about how he was taken advantage of, and like I said, a blocked memory, that thing was unblocked right then and there – the flood gates were open.”

Fahlenkamp said ever since he had spoken out he has had many relationships form, including a Des Moines pastor Cole Deike, who he met at a metal band concert.

Deike said he remembers meeting Fahlenkamp as he came through a prayer line after the concert.

“We wouldn’t have the friendship we have today if he wouldn’t have spoke out,” Deike said.

Seth’s father Wes said he didn’t think about the problem of sexual assault very often until about two and a half years ago when Seth came to him and his mother to tell them what one of his high school teachers had done to him.

“Now I think about this subject a lot — when something hits home, it becomes a part of your life, when you see it on the news it may be horrible and it may be tragic but it’s someone else,” Wes said.

Wes said he believes the moment a sexual assault victim speaks out is when things start to change for the better.

“My son was as hero when he spoke out,” Wes said. “Parents, I ask you to believe your child if they tell you they are victims and I ask you to stand with them and do something about it.”

Fahlenkamp said with crisis intervention services, he was skeptical at first and he didn’t think he needed counseling.

“Because I spoke out I had a lot of people supporting me, but then I hit the lowest low I’ve ever hit in my life,” Fahlenkamp said. “I’ve been doing counseling with crisis intervention for about three years and it was something I never considered was for me.”

Fahlenkamp said he has been battling depression and sought counseling from Michellia Friesen, a sexual assault coordinator at crisis intervention. Fahlenkamp said because of the counseling he has progressed over the years.

“Being able to connect with people on the worst things, gives you the power to connect on the best things,” Fahlenkamp said. “When you speak out you don’t just become another statistic of sexual assault, you become the story that no one else can tell.”

To learn more about Crisis Intervention Services, call 1-800-270-1620 or visit stopdvsa.org.

Contact Kayla Langmaid at 641-792-3121 ext. 6533 or klangmaid@newtondailynews.com