I feel so much better. The word “they” has now become accepted as singular. The Washington Post Style Guide recently announced that “they” can be used in the singular form, which we’ve all been doing verbally anyway. It’s now OK to write, “I asked the Iowa Caucus goer who ‘they’ were voting for.” It’s much easier than writing “he/she,” which is awkward at best, and can be insulting.
I can finally sleep at night. As a writer, I have been struggling with the “they” dilemma all my life, and going through all kinds of gyrations to make tenses agree. Let’s see, I could use the gender neutral “he” to represent both female and male. As in, “The good doctor said he...” After all, the masculine embraces the feminine, right? (If I want to die at an early age, it does.) Or, I could change everything to plural so that “they” would work. Or, I could purposely use “they” incorrectly and take the volley of abuse from the nitpickers. And believe me, the grammar gleaners are out there.
The simplest solution is to just go ahead and use “they” because it’s OK now. Oh, I can hear the fingernails on the chalkboard now.
I can still remember my high school English teacher and her pinpoint red pencil. I think she sharpened it with her teeth. She would circle each “they” I had written incorrectly and downgrade my writing, even though she had just told the class that she had, “Received a phone call from an old friend, and ‘they’ were coming to see her.” Jeez.
The American Dialect Society has made “they” their word of the year. Which threw Mary Norris, the self-styled comma queen of the New Yorker into a snit fit. As reported by NPR, she was also caught writing in her book, “Between You & Me,” the sentence, “Nobody wanted to think they were not essential.” So, there you go. Even the style snobs get it wrong.
For the genderqueer people, “they” is much preferable to either “he” or “she.” (I’m serious, folks, “genderqueer” is an actual word that’s not derogatory or slang. It means having a gender identity that is other than male or female, or a combination of the two genders.) For transsexuals, the writer might be better off using “they” instead of making a mistake as to whether the person is male or female. Life is complicated these days.
“You” has been used as both singular and plural for centuries now, so we might as well go ahead and throw in “they,” like scratching that itch in the middle of your back. The English language, like all languages, is fluid. It’s constantly changing. “They” is the hermaphrodite of the gender-neutral third-person singular personal pronouns. Chew on that one for awhile.
If it’s good enough for Jonathan Swift, as in, “Every fool can do as they’re bid,” it’s good enough for me. Now we’ll see how the editor at the newspaper feels.
I’ll bet that they take exception.
Have a good story? Call or text Curt Swarm in Mt. Pleasant at 319-217-0526 or email him at curtswarm@yahoo.com.