DEAR ABBY: Many women like surprises. Most men don’t. My wife can’t understand that. She recently “surprised” me by informing me she had made non-refundable arrangements for us to visit a foreign country. She said I had once mentioned that I’d like to see it. I have no recollection of saying so, but I suppose it’s possible.

Abby, I am physically barely able to endure such travel. My balance is bad and walking is extremely painful for my legs and hips. I wish she would have discussed her plan with me in advance. It’s possible she wanted very much to go and suspected I’d tell her it would be unwise for me to do it.

Now that we’re locked in, I’ll go. But if it becomes too arduous, I’ll tell her that we’re going to have to leave the group and return home immediately. Perhaps that would help her understand that she should talk to me about a plan that includes me before implementing it. Abby, can you comment? — GOT AN UNWELCOME SURPRISE