DEAR ABBY: I married “Linda” 22 years ago. Three years later, the marriage was over. After our divorce, I came out as gay. I met a wonderful man in 1996, and we were married in Iowa in 2009.

Over the years, I have wondered how Linda was getting along. I’d like to get back in touch with her. At one time we lived only a few miles from her. I drove by her home, but lost my nerve when I saw her father standing outside. Family members discouraged me from attempting to contact her after our split. I heard a few weeks ago that Linda has remarried, although I’m not sure how long ago.

Obviously, I have no desire to rekindle a romance. I’m happily married and assume she is, too. I would like to talk with her, but I don’t know if it would be a mistake. I have considered contacting her via a third party. What do you think? — LINDA’S EX IN COUNCIL BLUFFS